The Trip to India That Changed My Life

It took me years to realize that I was living an unsustainable lifestyle. It was anxiety, disguised as ambition. The kind of life where I pushed a little harder, slept a little less. Until one day my body broke in the most sacred place, the one I kept postponing for “later” - my fertility.

So for the first time in my life, I paused.

I went to India, to an Ayurvedic center Amal Tamara. I disconnected from everything - news, social media, work. With the help of an experienced team (and a generous amount of ghee), my brain slowly surrendered to quiet, peace, and a level of clarity I had never known before. Ironically, by doing less, even nothing, I began to understand far more than I ever had in a perpetual race.

The first lesson from my Ayurvedic retreat: stress for women is deeply disruptive. It sits at the root of many dysfunctions in our bodies. And yet, modern Western society celebrates it.

Be successful. Be fit. Be everything at once. Work like a man, run a household, and on top of that, meet a beauty standard that is not even natural.

The second lesson: food is medicine. Not in a poetic way. In a very literal, consistent, daily way.

The third lesson:

Your skin is your largest organ. It absorbs everything it comes into contact with. And that absorption increases with heat, friction, and time.

For the first time, I looked at my clothes not as something that makes me look good, but as something that either supports me or slowly harms me.

Then I went one layer deeper - my underwear.

Most of mine, at the time, was synthetic. Polyester, nylon, elastane - the very materials leading U.S. underwear brands sell as the secret to your sexuality, wrapped in a big pink bow and an unreasonable markup. They sell an illusion, a mirage of being irresistibly desired. But rarely do they talk about what these materials do to your body.

I believe, with good reason, that the U.S. government is failing to protect us from substances that may contribute to birth defects, female reproductive issues, autoimmune diseases, and cancer.

And while we have started questioning toxic ingredients in food and cosmetics, the $3 trillion fashion industry has somehow evaded the same level of scrutiny.

Even though:

Cotton is one of the most chemically intensive crops, with heavy pesticide use linked to serious health issues among farmers, including cancer. Textile workers in mills and leather tanneries have long been known to develop skin lesions and respiratory problems.

In 2011, textile manufacturing ranked among the largest contributors to water pollution in China. A Greenpeace report found toxic endocrine disruptors like NPEs, phthalates, and restricted azo dyes in 89 out of 141 clothing samples tested. Brands from Giorgio Armani to Calvin Klein and H&M were implicated.

Alden Wicker, the author of reclaimed book To Dye For, that exposes fashion’s toxicity, said in the book:

“I have found evidence that a lot of certified organic cotton is fraudulent, sadly.”

Diving into this research, and realizing how untraceable and potentially toxic fashion can be, honestly scared me.

Because I do want to become a mother. I want to carry healthy babies. I want to live a long, full life. And right now, it feels like there are too many risks.

Somewhere in India, in that stillness, in a body that finally felt rested and clean, the idea for LunaLeila came to me.

A project in complete alignment. A massive market, yes. But an even bigger mission.

I’ll leave you with a small piece of homework.

Examine your underwear drawer, trash uncertified, synthetic underwear. You deserve better.

We are counting down the days until we go live. Visit our website and sign up to be the first to know when the healthiest underwear arrives.

P.S. Deep gratitude to Amal Tamara, a hidden paradise in India, for the care and nurturing I received. The path of Amal Yatri stays with me.